An Ode to Femtors Past, Present, & Future
At home…
In a usually spotless office not often privy to rambunctious toddlers, a red toy barn is ready to accept three horses back into their stables, a baby doll missing key appendages needs an urgent diaper change, and all the writing utensils that can be found are needed to desperately to write the letter “A”. There, amidst a flurry of dynamic curiosity, we settle (she lays calmly on the dog bed, and I sit at my computer) to eagerly listen to two students (undergraduate & doctoral) practice their first conference presentations. This is the first real moment I fully understood what being a femtor looks and feels like in action—urgent, messy, un/certain, authentic, strategic, and full of possibility. I see my students witnessing me juggle the significance of these moments in real time.
In the middle…
Binary and one-dimensional thought is always insufficient. This is one of the enduring assumptions I carry throughout my interactions with students from developing a timeline to supporting the evolution of new insights related to their research endeavors. Here, in the middle, is where things happen—it is the threshold where ‘the not yet’ is an inherent feature of research and becoming-researcher. Whether in the form of graduation cycles, data analysis, or drafting manuscripts—the entries and exits are endless. A call to begin and end oversaturates our daily work. As such, the only way to stay in the mo(ve)ment, is to ensure the ideas are always on the move, rendering the multitemporal entanglements (i.e., thoughts, ideas, literature, goals, demands, desires, questions) visible. This is where un/certainty thrives.
Striving beyond…
The impact of our research is central. Non-linear, lived, and always beyond containment–our collective work reverberates across space-time boundaries we may never live to see. My students are expected to foster new ways of living and thinking for themselves and the communities in which the work matters. This may appear as traditional metrics of ‘success’ in the academy (e.g., conference presentations, publications, grant proposals, IRB applications, etc.), but these conventional outcomes are merely a byproduct to the persistent identity work educational inquiry (in all senses of the phrase) demands. This is a strategic endeavor.
Together…
There is no tidy protocol, formula, or checklist—and if one surfaces, we proceed with skepticism. We take seriously the rigor and complexity inherent to educational research. We provoke new questions, actions, and claims about the educational experience to reimagine how it might be known, felt, and perceived otherwise. This is an authentic inquiry.
We wonder.
One need not be a mother or even woman to be a femtor. In fact, femtorship is something we all have the capacity to live out in our daily work. All that is needed is a willingness to be vulnerable---notably, this is a characteristic that is in direct conflict with the hegemonic traditions (and desires) of the ‘ivory tower’. By de-centering the patriarchal roots implied in the normative (and normalizing power) of men-torship, I strive to render a philosophy of fem-torship (past, present, and future) visible.
This work is urgent, messy, un/certain, authentic, strategic, and full of possibility.
In a usually spotless office not often privy to rambunctious toddlers, a red toy barn is ready to accept three horses back into their stables, a baby doll missing key appendages needs an urgent diaper change, and all the writing utensils that can be found are needed to desperately to write the letter “A”. There, amidst a flurry of dynamic curiosity, we settle (she lays calmly on the dog bed, and I sit at my computer) to eagerly listen to two students (undergraduate & doctoral) practice their first conference presentations. This is the first real moment I fully understood what being a femtor looks and feels like in action—urgent, messy, un/certain, authentic, strategic, and full of possibility. I see my students witnessing me juggle the significance of these moments in real time.
In the middle…
Binary and one-dimensional thought is always insufficient. This is one of the enduring assumptions I carry throughout my interactions with students from developing a timeline to supporting the evolution of new insights related to their research endeavors. Here, in the middle, is where things happen—it is the threshold where ‘the not yet’ is an inherent feature of research and becoming-researcher. Whether in the form of graduation cycles, data analysis, or drafting manuscripts—the entries and exits are endless. A call to begin and end oversaturates our daily work. As such, the only way to stay in the mo(ve)ment, is to ensure the ideas are always on the move, rendering the multitemporal entanglements (i.e., thoughts, ideas, literature, goals, demands, desires, questions) visible. This is where un/certainty thrives.
Striving beyond…
The impact of our research is central. Non-linear, lived, and always beyond containment–our collective work reverberates across space-time boundaries we may never live to see. My students are expected to foster new ways of living and thinking for themselves and the communities in which the work matters. This may appear as traditional metrics of ‘success’ in the academy (e.g., conference presentations, publications, grant proposals, IRB applications, etc.), but these conventional outcomes are merely a byproduct to the persistent identity work educational inquiry (in all senses of the phrase) demands. This is a strategic endeavor.
Together…
There is no tidy protocol, formula, or checklist—and if one surfaces, we proceed with skepticism. We take seriously the rigor and complexity inherent to educational research. We provoke new questions, actions, and claims about the educational experience to reimagine how it might be known, felt, and perceived otherwise. This is an authentic inquiry.
We wonder.
One need not be a mother or even woman to be a femtor. In fact, femtorship is something we all have the capacity to live out in our daily work. All that is needed is a willingness to be vulnerable---notably, this is a characteristic that is in direct conflict with the hegemonic traditions (and desires) of the ‘ivory tower’. By de-centering the patriarchal roots implied in the normative (and normalizing power) of men-torship, I strive to render a philosophy of fem-torship (past, present, and future) visible.
This work is urgent, messy, un/certain, authentic, strategic, and full of possibility.